Monday, September 2, 2013

A tomorrow that never comes

I intended to get into a regular routine of writing. I had so many plans. I am so good at making plans, setting goals, imagining what it will be like, where it all might lead.
I am slightly less accomplished at achieving these goals. If things work out, fall into place, I think my idea is good. If I encounter significant roadblocks, I start to question the validity of my plans.
Almost every evening while I stand in the shower, reviewing the events of my day, turning them over in my mind, I renew afresh my resolve to adhere to my most recent proposed eating plan. While I review my plans for the next day I feel a surge of optimism and resolve. Tomorrow I will start afresh. It will be the day I overcome. I will eat the foods on my eating plan and I will not eat anything else. Simple enough. But somehow on the next day by three o'clock in the afternoon, I find a box of crackers or a dish of ice cream in my hand. By dinner time I am munching away on this and that as I prepare the evening meal for my family.
Plans derailed, I revert to my default eating pattern which is mindless eating and too much of it. But by the time the day is done and I am in the shower again, I am starting all over, making plans for tomorrow, a tomorrow that never comes.
Writing isn't that different from dieting. It requires a commitment of time and choosing to stick to it even when it is easier to return to the default activity, usually cleaning. Sure cleaning is good but it won't help me a become a better writer. For that matter, my homemade chocolate biscotti is pretty good but it won't help me become a thinner women.
That is why on this weekend that traditionally marks the end of summer I have only blogged twice and I haven't lost an ounce of weight since I arrived in Florida over three months ago.
Thankfully I will probably have the chance to try again tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow until I have no more tomorrows. Another chance to do it better. Another day to spend on the things that really chocolate biscotti.

No comments:

Post a Comment